Do you think I’ll ever measure up in Hubs eyes? Each day he finds new ways of letting me know that I am unworthy of…well, anything. It’s not like I don’t ever get anything, but boy oh boy do I pay for what I get, even if it isn’t with cold hard cash.
This brings me to his latest showing of feelings. Hubs wants a truck. He wants to pull that jeep places instead of driving it. I understand this, the jeep isn’t what you would consider a “smooth ride” and the car of course can’t pull a trailer! Hubs found a truck that he likes. He’s talked with the bank and the payment will increase by $100 if he gets the truck. That is with $3000 down. The truck is very nice, it’s a duramax diesel with low miles. It’s got 4 full doors and every option you can imagine. There are other trucks out there that aren’t as fancy or new that we could afford easier. Hubs says that he doesn’t think we’d be able to finance them if the mileage or age is high.
BUT, I thought we were broke! I’m told daily that we don’t have any money. How are we going to come up with an extra $100 a month, PLUS the extra money in gas? Especially now that I won’t have a job after next friday! I know I only made about $75 a week, but that’s $300 a month LESS now.
He keeps telling me that I need to get a job. Where am I going to get a job? I’m an over weight, under educated MOM. Where will I get a job that will even pay for childcare for 2 kids? 3 kids when #2 isn’t in school. There’s a lady here in town, and she pays $120 a WEEK for childcare for ONE child! I’ve thought about applying at Target as a night stocker. That way, I wouldn’t have to put the kids in daycare. Granted that also means that I will be putting even more miles on my car, it’s got 167K already! Yep, it’s got that many miles! See, the plan when he bought his car last year was that when we paid it off, I’d drive that and we’d put the van down on a truck for Hubs.
Am I just being selfish? Should I just bite the bullet and get a job? Am I worrying about putting the kids in daycare too much?
